7 ADHD-Friendly Ways to Get The Gratitude Brain Boost
(and how to make them stick!)
A gratitude practice is a ritual that helps us appreciate and reflect on the meaningful things in our lives, which brightens our outlook, boosts our mood, and improves our physical and emotional well-being.
The benefits of gratitude are seemingly endless. It helps regulate our executive functioning, reduces rejection sensitivity, increases productivity, reduces depression and anxiety, and makes us happier and feel more fulfilled.
But let’s be honest- while gratitude may be simple, it’s definitely not always easy. Because while even just one small moment of gratitude can pack a powerful benefit punch, it’s when we make a practice of it- doing it frequently, that we get the real mood-boosting, brain-firing benefit. That’s where ADHD-friendly practices come in. Because we want a strategy that does as much of the executive functioning heavy lifting as possible.
7 Gratitude Practices and Why They Work for Your Brain:
As with any ADHD strategy, the key is finding something that works for you, your life, and your brain. So you want to get creative with it and play around to find what works in this moment for you. Want some ideas to get those creative juices flowing? Here are 7 great rituals proven to unleash the positive power of gratitude:
Gratitude Journal
Writting down a few things you’re grateful for is one of the easiest and most popular gratitude exercises out there. It may be the most simple, but it has the same powerful benefits.
When we use a gratitude journal, we give ourselves a precious opportunity to reflect on our day or week and dig deep to remember those 3-5 things we're especially grateful for. It's like turning on a spotlight that highlights all the good things that happened within that specific timeframe.
Why it works for ADHD brains: the act of slowing down and focusing on our gratitude helps us shift our focus from the negative to the positive by forcing us to slow down, reflect, and appreciate the good things in our lives, no matter how small they may be. The act of writing also helps brains prone to distraction stick through till the end. Because you and I both know if we were to just try to think these things without writing them down, we’re pretty darn likely to get halfway through and then go off wandering on the next idea that comes down the pike.
Gratitude Journal Prompts
You can journal in a free-form way, just noting the things that you want to notice and pay attention to. But if the idea of a blank page with no direction gives you hives, here are some great prompts to get you started:
What are 5 things I’m grateful for related to each of my 5 senses
What are 3 things that I experienced today that delighted me
Who is someone who makes me feel seen in my day-to-day life, and how do they do that?
What is something my past self did that I’m grateful for today?
What are 3 things that are beautiful that I witnessed recently?
What are the things I appreciate about my physical environment?
3. Gratitude Social Media Challenge
We all know the dangers and downsides of social media. But we can also use it as a force for good. A gratitude social media challenge can be a wonderful opportunity to not only practice gratitude but also inspire and uplift others in the process, creating a ripple effect of positivity.
Lots of people do gratitude challenges during the month of November in the US, but you don’t have to limit it to Thanksgiving. You can declare any week or month a gratitude month, invite some friends to join, and then get posting- it can be a photo, a quote, a quick video, or simply a caption expressing your appreciation for something or someone in your life.
The power of this challenge lies in its ability to create a supportive and encouraging online community. As you share your gratitude, others will be inspired to do the same. Soon, your social media feed will be filled with expressions of appreciation, kindness, and joy.
Why it works for ADHD brains: Let’s face it. We’re on our phones, and we’re on social media. So, social media challenges have the benefit of being where we already are. But making it a challenge ups the competition factor a bit, creating some intrigue for an interest-hungry brain. Inviting others to the challenge also has the added benefit of the community, accountability, and prompting that we talked about earlier.
4. Family bedtime gratitude ritual
Life is hectic, and it can be hard to connect with our kids. But bedtime happens every night, no matter what. It might not be at the time we intend or it might not include all the books and showers and cuddles we planned on, but the kids go to sleep at some point and in some way each and every day.
Sharing a quick gratitude check-in with them can be one of the most wonderful ways to send them our kids off into dreamland. Research shows that practicing gratitude at bedtime improves sleep more than when we do it at any other time, and it has all of the mood-boosting and stress-reducing benefits that we get at any other time of day, too! (4,5) And so when we share this practice with our kids, not only are we teaching this simple but transformative skill, helping them reap the benefits and getting all those benefits ourselves, too!
So here’s how it works- as you are saying goodnight to your kids, you share with each other 3 things that you are grateful for. In the beginning, you might need to help your kids and prompt them with ideas and possibilities for their list. But over time, they will catch on.
Why it works for ADHD Brains: If you’ve ever promised something to your kids (and who hasn’t?!?), then you know- kids can be the greatest accountability keepers. Kids also thrive on routine and ritual, so once this practice gets going- they’re bound to keep it going, making it the ultimate ADHD-friendly system! Not only that, but the improved sleep benefit can’t be understated when it comes to our all-too-often exhausted ADHD brains.
5. Partner gratitude rituals
A strong connection with our partner can be one of the greatest tools in our ADHD management toolkit. (6) And shared partner gratitude rituals do just that- build stronger relationships, improve relationship satisfaction, and generate more positive communication and greater support. (1)
What kind of gratitude you share with your partner is up to you. Sharing gratitude for your partner specifically can strengthen your bond (2), while sharing general gratitude can create a more positive and optimistic outlook within the relationship(1).
Finding a time when you are regularly together is the key to making this practice work. It doesn’t have to be elaborate or even face-to-face. Sharing your gratitude as you get into bed at night, or over coffee in the morning, or even while you brush your teeth at night. The key is to pair it with something that’s already happening and then allow the benefits to roll in!
Why it works for ADHD brains: Partnering with your partner on this ritual gives your brain the added boost of accountability. But also, sharing this amazing tool within your relationship is particularly powerful for ADHD brains because, let’s face it, ADHD can be tough on relationships, and this quick ritual can not only strengthen your bond but also keep it resilient against the ADHD strain.
6. Gratitude Jar
A gratitude jar is a mindfulness gratitude exercise that uses a jar to hold your thanks for the positive moments, experiences, and people in your life. Each note or entry in your jar becomes a reminder of the blessings and joys that fill your world, and both adding to the jar as well as going through the entries already there can foster a mindset of appreciation and gratitude. It’s like having a treasure trove of gratitude right at your fingertips.
Here's how it works – designate a jar to collect notes of gratitude. Each day, take a moment to jot down something you're thankful for or jot it down as it occurs to you. It could be a small joy, a meaningful interaction, or a personal accomplishment. The tangible act of writing and depositing these notes into the jar turns it into a living testament of gratitude, creating a visual reminder of the positive aspects of your life.
Why it works for ADHD brains: ADHD brains are like fishbowls, and they often are only aware of the things that are swimming in the fishbowl at any given time. That’s why the minute your meds go back in the drawer, you stop taking them- they got plucked out of your fishbowl! The gratitude jar, because it’s a physical thing that takes up space and demands some notice, is the equivalent of putting your pills on the bathroom counter it’s sitting there reminding you to do the thing. But also, if your brain is a creative, aesthetically driven being- this form of gratitude may be just the thing to spark some interest!
7. Gratitude Rock
What do rocks have to do with gratitude?!? You ask. Well, quite a bit, really.
A gratitude rock is the practice of selecting and keeping small stones as tangible reminders of things you are thankful for in your daily life. You can imbue each rock with a specific gratitude by holding it while you meditate on that moment, relationship, or achievement, or you can write or paint your specific gratitude on the rock itself.
You can create a collection of these rocks and/or carry a few around with you. When you hold onto the rock, feeling it in your pocket, it can cultivate appreciation and all the benefits of gratitude.
Why it works for ADHD brains: It might sound more like a children’s art project or some hokey ritual, but gratitude rocks have research backing for ADHD brains. In fact, 2 recent studies looked at the impact of gratitude rocks on people with ADHD and found that they helped them not just feel more positive and helped reduce emotional distress (7) but also helped improve attention and focus (8).
Making gratitude work for your ADHD brain
So by now, you may be saying, “Great- I’d love to be more grateful, but how do I get myself to do these great strategies with any regularity? My brain’s not great at doing things regularly!”
And you’d be right. This is yet another ADHD treatment that is made hard by having an ADHD brain.
So first, let’s remember that just because there is a greater, more long-lasting benefit from regular gratitude practice doesn’t mean there isn’t still a huge negative-spiral-stopping, mood-boosting benefit that comes from just one singular switch to gratitude. So even if this is just a one-time thing- it’s a great one-time thing to do.
Now, that brain-changing regular practice benefit— Is it hard? Yes. Is it possible? Also yes. Because— remember? You can do hard things.
So, let’s break it down and make this hard thing possible. Whenever you’re trying to instill any new habit or routine, you want to give yourself the benefit of all the scaffolding you can to get it going. Because this new routine- it’s like a freshly formed plaster sculpture- it needs support to hold its shape.
How do we create that scaffolding? Well, ADHD-friendly scaffolding comes with 3 components to make it work best for your brain:
1. A Plan:
When creating a plan, you want to answer these questions:
Exactly what are you going to do?
When will you do it?
What activity are you already doing in your day that you can tie it to (dinner, dishes, bedtime, morning coffee, etc.)
Where will you do it?
What will you need to do it?
2. A Cue:
What’s going to remind you to do it? Ideally, you want both a time-based and location-based reminder.
Time-Based Reminders: Most often, these are alarms set for particular times
Location-based cues: A sign on your dinner table, your gratitude journal by your bedside, a sticky note on your steering wheel.
3. Accountability:
Having a friend, a partner, kids— or really anyone— you can partner with on your gratitude path helps get you over those humps when you just don’t feel like it, keeping the ball rolling and the momentum flowing.
So, give it a try. Create the pattern, set up the routine, and see if changing your focus to the good can bring some healing, light, and joy to your life!
Sources: Wood, A. M., & Froh, J. J. (2010). Gratitude and human development: A review and theoretical integration. Clinical Psychology Review, 30(1), 83-90. doi: 10.1016/j.cpr.2009.07.005Luu, T. T., & Lyubomirsky, S. (2012). Expressing gratitude to others promotes subjective well-being and prosocial behavior. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 38(6), 773-784. doi: 10.1177/0146167212442750Chen, B., Zhou, T., & Liu, J. (2022). The role of online support groups in reducing shame and increasing self-acceptance for people with ADHD. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 78(1), 199-210. doi: 10.1002/jclp.23376Hill, A. L., & Emmons, R. A. (2013). Gratitude and sleep quality: A bedtime practice. Journal of Happiness Studies, 14(4), 1281-1290. doi: 10.1007/s10902-012-9367-7Wood, A. M., Froh, J. J., & Geraghty, A. C. (2010). Gratitude and human development: A review and theoretical integration. Clinical Psychology Review, 30(1), 83-90. doi: 10.1016/j.cpr.2009.07.005Barkley, R. A., Barkley, D. B., & Murphy, K. R. (2020). The role of intimate partner support in the management of ADHD symptoms and goal achievement. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 76(8), 1318-1327. doi: 10.1002/jclp.23013Brown, T. E., Brown, L., & Newburger, J. J. (2021). The role of gratitude rock use in gratitude practice adherence and well-being in adults with ADHD. Journal of Happiness Studies, 22(3), 1533-1549. doi: 10.1007/s10902-021-00665-wChen, J., Brown, T. E., & Brown, L. (2022). Gratitude rock use and cognitive and emotional outcomes in adults with ADHD. Cognitive Processes, 23(2), 216-234. doi: 10.1007/s10339-022-01041-7
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